As much as I would like to do what I said I would do today yesterday, I can’t. My mind, emotions and soul have been gobsmacked. Partly due to the growing complexity that is now overwhelming my original, deeply skeptical, view of the distorted hall of mirrors that attends anything to do with Erika Kirk, much of which I wasn’t aware of until yesterday evening, and all of which could be subject to phenomenological analysis that may instantly “blow it out of the water,” dissolve it into mist, or tsunamically magnify it to infinity.
Because of what I seemed to find out yesterday evening, and then pondered deeply during my usual 2 AM, two hour, wide awake period, I found myself utterly distracted, and I mean dangerously distracted this morning, while driving to the grocery store, and then nearly backing into a parked car while slowly attempting to park my car. My perspective on the lines that are supposed to guide the car into line had warped; I “woke up” to the perceptual distortion barely in time.
This near-accident sobered me considerably. But still didn’t stop me from further pondering. Then I asked my friend Laura (who is 52, BTW, not 42!, one Saturn cycle younger than me, not “half my age”) for advice. She sent that advice to me, and then made it also into a post, which I repost for your consideration.
It helped. But not enough to “put me back on (3D) track.” In fact, I think I’ve either jumped the tracks or they’ve suddenly gone underground, leaving me high and dry, and with no 5D track in sight!
Meanwhile, I’m going to take the rest of the day off. And maybe even tomorrow. Maybe not post again until Monday next. Truly, I do seem to be in a liminal period where my brain and consciousness and heart and soul are being rewired, to the point where I can’t trust myself to say anything without wanting to immediately backtrack or else spray it immediately with further questions, warping perspectives, etc.
Or maybe that’s what we’re all going through?
I’ve been personally working with the movement from 3D to 5D dimensional awareness for a long time. 5D is both empathic and neutral, plays with 3D dramas but does not succumb to them. Ever.
Oh yeah? Well, yesterday evening I fell into another “conspiratorial”(?) rabbit hole, and, frankly, still crawling around into its deep, suffocating dark.
They call what humanity is going through “ascension”?
I’d say it’s more like hell — for now.
And Laura’s right. Timelines matter. Which one am I on? LOVE? or F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real). Expansion? or Contraction? Creativity? or Cruelty? Empathic communion or Robotic routine. Which one do I prefer to be on? Which one keeps on looping me back down in, like the trauma-bonded addict I morphed into after reading Cathy O’Brien’s Trance Formation of America prior to the turn of the millennium, and taking several more years to truly absorb and process it.
Or maybe I haven’t processed it yet! Maybe the CK extravaganza psy-op(?) got to me! Maybe I’m just a foolish nearly 83-year-old woman, who keeps on “thinking” she can “figure it all out.” (i.e., 3D.) Whatever it is! Fascinating (fake?) apparent conundrums draw me in like a moth to a flame.
Or: maybe I’m still in the chrysalis phase, not yet birthed from worm into butterfly. Else why would I have been so gobsmacked, once again, when, hormonally stabbed awake, I robotically opened my ipad, as usual, at 2 AM?
